Two Days Without Scam, Nation Shocked! – Sorry State Of Affairs In India

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Our most honest Prime Minister, his cabinet colleagues, Chairperson of UPA, all politicians and bureaucrats, should feel ashamed to read this beautiful satirical article, written by Despondent Correspondent of Times of India, which appeared today on its online edition. I am reproducing below this article, which is funny but unfortunately sad commentary of current state of affairs of this country, where without greecing the palms of the persons, which matters, you can’t afford to survive here.

Complete text of article of Times of India:

In a shocking development, India has gone a full 48 hours without a new scam being reported. There was an uproar in Parliament over the lethargy shown by the government in the field of corruption.

The leader of the opposition in the Lok Sabha said: “India is among the world’s top countries in terms of scams and corruptions. However, the shocking lack of any new scam being reported in two days shows the government is not serious about stealing from the poor.” She then rushed to the well of the House screaming, “All is well”. UPA leaders countered her with chants of “Shush, Ma! Shush, Ma!”

SP leader  Mulayam Singh was heard telling both parties he’ll support them at all costs. Later, TMC leader Mamata Banerjee called a press conference to condemn this ‘shocking attempt at honesty and clean governance’. She said her party would move a no-confidence motion against the UPA government but no one in the press conference understood her accent.

The media too unleashed a series of editorials slamming the lack of scams. “What will we print?” was the popular question. Some news channel anchors were seen frothing at the mouth and screaming for answers but experts said this was normal behaviour.

Shaken by the developments, the Prime Minster addressed the nation live and promised to tackle the situation after the go-ahead from Madam. He first apologized for his statement: “Money does not grow on trees.” He said: “Clearly, I was mistaken. Money does grow on trees. However, these trees are only found in the homes of people with stakes in coal mines.”

The PM promised that judicious use of the RTI act, sting operations by TV channels and vague reports by the CAG will soon bring more scams to light. “It is inevitable,” he said. Meanwhile, to give citizens other things to focus on, the government raised the price of fuel. “I like raising the price of fuel every now and then. It is a hobby,” said petroleum minister Jaipal Reddy.

Baba Ramdev too joined the jamboree. He started by congratulating the PM over his miracle – the discovery of speech. Addressing a press conference in women’s clothes, which he claimed are the latest fashion, the guru told the nation to sit in front of their TVs and vigorously push their stomachs in and out in an attempt to fight corruption. Sources said by the time this article gets printed a new scam is bound to have come to light.

Will this have any effect on our incorrigible netas? Unfortunately, Not. God save this country of one billion plus!

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